Guide to Burning for Lost Boys

and girls too of course.

Going to a Burn presents a unique challenge for Lost Boys (people with ADD/ADHD).  Stimulation is constant and in wide variety.  Sensory overload is a real danger.  Grown Ups (normal people) could easily become overwhelmed and spend the entire time in their tent rocking back and forth sucking their thumbs.  Luckily, Lost Boys are born with a natural skill set to handle these situations.  

Here on Earth, they have a group of kids called “Boy Scouts” who have some interesting ideas on how to live.  They have a motto or something that says, “Always be prepared.”  While this is impossible and silly, we can still learn something from it.  You should spend the weeks before a burn kinda thinking about how awesome everything is gonna be.  Don’t over think though!  You could think yourself scared of the shear quantity of impending awesome.  OMG! There is gonna be fire!  *breathe*

First thing first, once you have decided to go to a burn, you should find your local Burner community and introduce yourself.  This is an adventure in and of itself.  Check to see if the info at http://regionals.burningman.com/ helps at all, but it might not.  Google shit.  Look on Facebook and other social networks.  Send emails.  Be friendly.  Don’t be shy.  Ask questions.  Figure out ways to meet some of the hard core Burners in person.

A week before the Burn, you should find some kind of receptacle for the things that are fortunate enough to join you on your adventure.  It could be a trashbag, a suitcase, the trunk of a car (though that’s not a great idea, but whatever), or a backpack.  One of those hardcore hiking packs would be the best option because of its size and portability, but as long as it can transport shit, it should work.  

During the days prior to a Burn you should start randomly shoving shit into your chosen carrying device of things.  Clothes, band-aids, a cup or two, spray paint or markers, string, maybe a small note book to write on, cool stuff that you might want to give to cool people you meet.  Indeed, you should spend some time finding cool stuff to Gift.  Also do random research on what to expect, as well as what “necessities” (bah!) you are going to need, like water, a tent, a sleeping bag, etc.  

Two days before a Burn, it’s time to get into the mindset of Burning.  We won’t have time during the actual event because we must spend the entire time adventuring.  Let’s start with the Ten Principles.
http://www.burningman.com/whatisburningman/about_burningman/principles





Radical Inclusion

What this means for a Lost Boy is EVERYONE is player in your game, a fellow adventurer.  At the Burn, everyone is your family. Treat everyone like you’ve known them forever.  This doesn’t mean you have to like everyone, for indeed some may be your antagonist.  If you’re lucky, you might meet your Nemesis at the Burn.  Most importantly, Radical Inclusion means loving your selves, all of them.  A Burn is the one place where everything that you are, is ok.  Include yourself.  To get yourself into this philosophy, you should start hugging everyone, making eye contact while smiling at people, and including people in your daily adventures.  Perhaps if you are brave you can even practice letting yourself be and do things you normally wouldn’t, for one reason or another.  Might be hard in the default world, but it will pay off hugely during the actual Burn.



Gifting

There are no monies at a Burn!  The very idea of money doesn’t fit here, or even bartering.  Nothing is free, ‘cuz that is a concept involving monies.  Instead, you give and receive gifts.   Remember, these people are your family.  Just follow your heart.  If you feel like you want to give something to someone, DO IT!  Want something?  Just ask.  Stay attached to nothing, instead let things flow to and from you.  In this way you can keep an ever changing array of cool stuff in your life.  To prepare for this, you can give away Free Hugs.  Or surprise presents to some of your friends!  Don’t give away too much though; not enough to put you on the streets.  Not yet anyways. (and remember, gifts can come in many forms :-)



Decommodification

If monies don’t exist, then we must look at things in a different way.  The very idea of ownership must change.  So, when looking at things, think Ours instead of Mine.  Practically, this means no corporate bullshit at a Burn, but I don’t really understand what that means.  I think it’s something like we replace corps with camps but then blur the lines that divide them and us.  It’s that whole Ours thing.  Remember the whole sharing thing from school?  Do that.  Share ALL THE THINGS!  I tried to barter once at a Burn.  It was a complete and total failure. Trust in the Burner Magic and Gift!


Radical Self-Reliance

Remember that this is YOUR adventure.  Possibly the only thing you can say you own.  Kinda.  A Burn is a giant live action Choose Your Own Adventure novel.  And much like a Choose Your Own Adventure novel, if you’re not liking how something is going, go back.  If shit gets weird, go somewhere else.  Trust in yourself, your millions of years of evolution, and your awesome brain.  Use the Force.  Follow your heart.  To practice this, go to youtube, watch random videos, and when a video starts to suck, pick a different video from the sidebar.  Oh, and I guess you are also in charge of making sure you get enough food and water and stuff like that.  (pro-tip: follow your nose)



Radical Self-Expression

In the default world, most of us are socialized to present ourselves as normal, or as normal as possible.  At a Burn, do the exact opposite.  Be Yourself!  Don’t know how?  Fuck it, do it anyway!  Skip from camp to camp, climb on shit, dance all the time, wear random clothing or no clothing at all, hug random strangers, play around in the dirt, throw a fit or two.  Pretty much anything that you were ever told not to do because it might embarrass your parents, or because it wasn’t cool, or because it might be dangerous, can be done.  In the days and weeks leading up to the Burn go out in public wearing slightly risqué clothing, like a feather boa or mismatching shoes.  Baby steps.


Communal Effort

If we want something done, we have to do it ourselves.  This means pure potential for adventures to a Lost Boy.  You get to help build art pieces, set up camps, cook yummies, decorate things, clean up.  Dreams come true at Burns, but only if enough people vote with their labor.  Do-acracy-type stuff.  Share yourself with others.  Practice for this could come in the form of helping a friend rearrange their room or helping them garden or something.  Post Burn, you will discover you have a large community near you of family who would love to participate in some awesome project of yours, especially if it benefits the family/community.  And you will learn that helping others in the same way gives you a glow in your belly that just doesn’t go away.


Civic Responsibility

We really are a family, a Tribe. And for our society to function and not implode, we must all take responsibility.  Help out with Greeter Station, or Ranger a shift.  Look after your fellow Burners.  If you notice someone hasn’t had any water in days, sit their ass down and force them to drink water.  A high pressure water pump helps with this.  Only you can prevent forest fires!  Step up.  Sometimes with family you have to be the one to be responsible.  Not all the time though.  So before the burn, make sure you have all your chores and errands done before you go.  Way to go. Captain Responsibility!



Leave No Trace

Or the bad guys will follow our trail of crap back to the Den.  We are stealth camping!  No MOOP! (matter out of place)  Plus, if we want to play indefinitely, we have to make sure our playground is in good shape at all times.  Sustainability, and all that jazz.  Indeed, what would be super sweet would be to leave shit in even better shape than before we got there.  Take that Nature!  I like to be a little destructive at Burns.  To do that in the spirit of Leave No Trace, I track down all the casualties of my debauchery and either burn them or take them back to my camp for hauling to a landfill.  Or turn the pieces into ART!  To get into the spirit of this, pick up some of the ever-present MOOP on the streets, also known as litter.


Participation

A Burn is a giant ball of potential adventures and adventurers!  Have an idea?  Get some people on board and make it happen!  Is something cool going on?  Join in on the fun!  Participation > Observation.  Sometimes. It’s also fun to watch cool shit, but we got youtube out in the default world, so get involved!  In case you’re wondering if it’s ok to participate, don’t worry, I’m giving you permission right now.  



Immediacy

Lost Boys really shouldn’t have any trouble with this one.  Just do it.  No time like the present.  If not now, when?  Go ahead and let your impulsive side take hold.  Follow your heart.  Do what you feel. Easy, no?



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Now the day before an actual Burn you should eat really well, drink looooots of water, take vitamins, and in a near state of panic do all the things you forgot to do before today.  Oh!  I mean the day before you leave for a Burn.  Damn, I bet my time scale is confusing up there.  Ok, in your mind add “you leave for” to every “In the X before a Burn” between before and a.  Also X = whatever time I had said up there.  Now let’s get back on track.

The night before you leave, take some sleep meds or something early in the night, like at 10pm or something.  This is probably going to be the last full night sleep you’re likely to get for a while.  Make sure not to take so many meds that you don’t wake up in time to leave on time... or not wake up at all or something.  That would suck.

Once you have everything packed up on the scheduled day to leave, make sure you have everything.  Check twice.  Thrice even!  You are going to forget something, that is inevitable, but a little constructive freaking out can reduce this.  Or make it worse.  Whatever.  Try not to antagonize the people who are riding with you, too much with your freaking out.  A little is ok though.  

On the ride to the Burn, go ahead and let yourself get really excited.  Get your hopes up.  Bounce around.  Buy candy and soda during gas stops.  Sing along to the radio.  Ask for frequent restroom breaks because of all the candy you ate and soda you drank.  The ride to a Burn is very important.  This is where you start to let yourself go.

As you approach the physical location of the event, make sure you have whatever you need to get in.  Smaller Burns will only ask your name, and maybe ask for identification.  Larger Burns will demand you have a ticket.  So get your I.D. or ticket ready.  I would suggest not putting the ticket in the same pocket as your camera and then climbing into the bed of the truck to truck surf into the event while taking pictures.  That’s how I lost my ticket to Burning Man in ‘09.  Alternatively, if you’re sneaking in, shove yourself into the big box you brought for that specific purpose.  I hope you put air holes in it.  

When dealing with the Gate Keepers, be friendly.  These are the people who keep everything as legal as possible so we can do this year after year.  It is a great, often thankless, service they do us.  Give them a hug, and lots of smiles.  Unless you’re in a box.  

Next, on to Greeter Station!

I’m always surprised by how many people act shy or reserved when they get to Greeter Station.  You’re HOME, dude!  Let your hair down.  Greeter Station invariably has some of the best people, usually with some kind of shenanigans going on.  This is your first chance to have some proper Burn fun.  Drink a beer.  Hug everyone.  Exchange names.  People with playa names are especially important to remember, although plenty of really cool Burners don’t have playa names. (Don’t feel bad if you forget people’s names; it happens).  Greeter Station is also a good place to randomly hang out.  Now get back in your car and head into the playa!  

If your part of a theme camp, you will probably have a designated area to camp.  If not, you might have to camp out in the boonies.  A possible workaround for this dilemma would be to pick random camps you pass and ask if you can camp with them, if they got room.  Many camps ask for more room than they actually need.  Regardless of where you’re camping, the first thing you want to do, other than taking a nap, is to set up your tent.  There is a high probability that hijinks will shortly ensue and if you don’t put your tent up now chances are that when you finally make it back to your camp you will be in no state to up it up then.  Ah, fuck it!  Either way, you’ll be ok.  Put on your best outfit/costume/adventure gear and go explore!

There is no standard operating procedure for Burning.  Everyone has their own style.  You will soon figure out what your style is.  Let me just give some suggestions and pro-tips.

If you arrive with plenty of sunlight out, go explore.  Start with nearby camps, meet people, name exchange, but move on quickly.  This quick pace will help you overcome any lingering anxiety or shyness left over from the default world.  You will soon lose those things that have little or no place here.  Try to memorize the placements of the different theme camps, as well as the porta-potties.  Find the Ranger and Med Stations.  Get to know these guys really well.  They will probably save your life.  Go check out the Effigy.  Feel free to explode the land you’re Burning on, too.  Take note of any camps that look really interesting, or have bars... these are good places to meander back to, at random.  

Make sure you bring a cup with you everywhere!  The best cups are ones you can somehow attach to your person, either by clipping it to your adventure harness, or putting it into your playa pack, or some other cool way of taking it with you.  My first burn I had one of those leather bota bags which I slung across my chest.  I would put whatever random liquid I found in there, making a constantly changing, interesting liquid concoction.  

If you are light skinned, of the type who burns easily, or indeed at all, you should probably put on some sunscreen.  If you didn’t pack any, ask some neighbor camps, or maybe a Ranger.  Or just do enough drugs that you won’t feel your skin blister.  This is actually good advice for just about anything.

When the sun is directly overhead it is a good time to socialize.  Find a random camp and sit down in an empty seat or right on the playa.  Talk about random shit, whatever interests you.  Don’t censor yourself.  I mean, really, talk about your interests, no matter how weird or nerdy.  You will discover that inevitably, you’re gonna find people here who like the same shit you do.

What are some things you can talk about?  Most Burners are spiritual/non-religious with strong opinions about that kinda stuff.  That always makes for interesting conversation.  Many have interesting and well thought out ideas on government.  Also, many Burners practice alternate sexuality or have different ideas on how to go about having human relationships.  Yes, that’s right. You can talk about the three things you shouldn’t talk about in polite company: Sex, Religion and Politics.  This isn’t polite society.  This is a Burn!

You’ll also find that being interested in other Burners takes on those three subjects. And being respectful of their opinion, will make you fast friends.  And those friends will then feed you noms!  It’s really easy to be respectful of their opinion.  Remember, these kids are just like you.  They didn’t fit well out there in the default world.  They thought too much, cared too much, or were just too different.  You will find that they have all lived very interesting lives (sometimes dark, sometimes not) but always inspiring.  

Be inspired by your Family!

Hopefully you will have found various camps that offer sanctuary before things get too crazy.  Because they are going to get crazy.  You will probably feel every emotion possible to feel, and perhaps even more intensely than you have ever felt them before.  Your trip can get bad.  Some camps specialize in chaos, and intense experience happens around them far more often than the calmer camps.  When things get to be too much, find the Carebear camps.  They will take care of you.  

BTW, if you’ve got unresolved issues in your life, you WILL confront them at a Burn.  This is the best chance you have to resolve those issues, to heal past wounds, and move forward in your life.  I know its scary to let go of the past, to Love. But be brave; for we all must do it, we all have done it.  If you’re going through something, your Burn family are the perfect people to talk to about it.  Don’t expect them to coddle you, or feed your emotional vampirism for long though.  We will push you out of the nest, for we know you can fly.  Good Luck!

Don’t worry about sleep.  You can get that eventually.  Like when you get back home.  

Do worry about water.  Drink as much as possible. It will keep you at 100 percent.  Food is far less important.  You probably got plenty of fat deposits with calories and vitamins stored up to see you through the Burn.  When is doubt, drink more water.  Seriously, if you’re starting to feel grumpy or sick or tired or weird, go drink water.

When someone dubs you with a playa name, don’t let your ego decide if you like it.  Does it Feel good?  If so, from now on, introduce yourself as that name.  If you don’t like the name, don’t be too vocal about it, or the person might take it as a challenge to get you called that by everyone.  The right one will stick, regardless.

Carry around a marker.

If you’re not sure how to act when someone gifts you one of the coolest things you’ve ever seen, don’t worry. It’s easy.  Act authentic.  Smile, thank them, maybe cry a little.  Or if you don’t want it, say so.  That’s cool, too.  Don’t feel obligated to give them anything; that’s not how things work.  If it makes you feel better, do the pay it forward thing.  But there is no need. The magic of Burn will take care of everything.  

No expectations, no attachments, just Love.  This is the best way to enjoy a Burn.  It’s far easier here than anywhere else.  Here you can let other people be themselves without worry.  Here you can let things go.  Here you can truly learn what it means to Love.  (For it is far more complex and beautiful than the world would have you believe.)

Make sure you get a good seat for the Effigy Burn and the Temple Burn, if there is one.  One way to do that is to get on perimeter duty.  Maybe, ‘cuz then you’re supposed to maintain the perimeter.  It’s pretty easy at a small burn, but at Burning Man you’ve got to stare people down to keep them in line.  Burners are crazy.  Go crazy while the Effigy burns.  STFU and take in the magic while the Temple burns.  Sear these experiences into your memory. Keep them forever.  They will be balls of strength for you when you go back to the Default world.  

Worship the Fire!  Don’t worry, people will only think you’re awesome if you do.  

Always ask permission, especially for the odd or raunchy stuff; except when it’s ok not to ask permission. You can get away with some crazy shit if you just ask first.  Taking pictures of naked people without their permission is just rude and if I see it, I will stomp the shit out of your camera.  

Find all your boundaries.  And then push the shit out of them.  If you’ve never made out with someone of the same sex, do it!  Go hang out with the chaos camps.  Participate in a bondage event.  You can go way further than that, but I’ll leave that for you to discover.  Remember though, it is up to you to defend your boundaries when the time comes.  RAWR!

If you bring your Girlfriend/Boyfriend, the best advice I can offer you is HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!   *deep breath* Ok, sorry about that.  Remember how I said no expectations, no attachments, just Love?  Yeah, get ready to practice that.  Both you and your partner will probably fall in love out on the playa, and not to each other.  Think about is this way: a Burn is a huge gathering of Soul mates.  Between souls, there is no such thing as boyfriend/husband/lover.  There is only Soul mate.  To help you overcome any jealousy issues you might encounter, remember that these are your Soul mates.  The person banging your boyfriend is your Soul mate.  Don’t get jealous, instead cheer on that person.  Two of the people you love the most in the entire cosmos are making each other happy right now.  Their love for each other does not diminish the love you receive.  Indeed, if you have the guts to truly live this, you will find that you will receive and give far more love than you thought possible.  It’s probably a good idea to sit down with your loved one before you go to the Burn and agree that you both want each other to be happy. And do not restrict any experience on each other’s behalf. No matter what happens, you will still love each other at the end.  

Don’t let anyone tell you what you are, or are not, capable of.  Although it is wise to listen to sage advice, you may well be the exception to the rule.  For example, I’m immortal.  I can survive anything.  Unless my body tells me I can’t, that is.  

On the last day, say your goodbyes.  Cling to people like you’re never going to see them again.  Get depressed.  Despondently pack your shit.  Clean up all the MOOP.  Cry a little.  Leave while stoically keeping your cool.  You’re heading back to the Default world.  It’s ok to feel despair.

But guess what?!?!!!?!  We can live like this!  You don’t have to stop Burning.  You’ve found out more about yourself in the course of a few days than most people do in their entire lives.  Don’t ever let that go.  Stubbornly refuse to put yourself back in a box.  Militantly demand that you live each day with Love.  

It won’t be easy though.  I will have to write another guide on How to Burn 365.

Welcome Home -^.^-

1) Stack all your fans in one corner of the living room. Put on your most fabulous outfit. Turn the fans on full blast. Dump a vacuum cleaner bag in front of them.

2) Tear down your house, put it in a truck. Drive 10 hours in any direction, put the house back together. Invite everyone you meet to come over and party. When they leave, follow them back to their homes, drink all their booze, and break things.

3) Pay an escort of your affectional preference subset to not bathe for five days, cover themselves in glitter, dust, and sunscreen, wear a skanky neon wig, dance close naked, then say they have a lover back home at the end of the night.

4)Buy a new set of expensive camping gear. Break it.

5) Lean back in a chair until that point where you’re just about to fall over, but you catch yourself at the last moment. Hold that position for 9 hours.

6) Only use the toilet in a house that is at least 3 blocks away. Drain all the water from the toilet. Only flush it every 3 days. Hide all the toilet paper.

7) Set your house thermostat so it’s 50 degrees for the first hour of sleep and 100 degrees the rest of the night.

8) Cut, burn, electrocute, bruise, and sunburn various parts of your body. Forget how you did it. Don’t go to a doctor.

9) Don’t sleep for 5 days. Take a wide variety of hallucinogenic/emotion altering drugs. Pick a fight with your boyfriend/girlfriend.

10) Spend a whole year rummaging through thrift storesfor the perfect, most outrageous costume. Forget to pack it.

11) Tell everyone that you’re going to a “Leave-No-Trace” event. Shop at Wal-mart, Cost-Co, and Home Depot until your car is completely packed with stuff. Empty your car into a dumpster.

12) Listen to music you hate for 168 hours straight, or until you think you are going to scream. Scream. Realize you’ll love the music for the rest of your life.

13) Spend 5 months planning a “theme camp” like it’s the invasion of Normandy.

14) Walk around your neighborhood and knock on doors until someone offers you cocktails and dinner.

15) Get so drunk you can’t recognize your own house. Walk slowly around the block for 5 hours.

16) Tell your boss you aren’t coming to work this week but he should “gift” you a paycheck anyway. When he refuses accuse him of not loving the “community”.

17) Search alleys untill you find a couch so unbelievably tacky and nasty filthy that a state college frat house wouldn’t want it. Take a nap on the couch and sleep like you are king of the world.

18) Go to a museum. Find one of Salvador Dali’s more disturbing but beautiful paintings. Climb inside it.

19) Before eating any food, drop it in a sandbox and lick a battery.

20) Spend thousands of dollars and several months of your life building a deeply personal art work. Hide it in a funhouse on the edge of the city. Hire people to come by and alternate saying “I love it” and “this sucks balls”. Blow it up.

21) Set up a DJ system downwind of a three alarm fire. Play a short loop of drum’n'bass until the embers are cold.

22) Make a list of all the things you’ll do different next year. Never look at it

***Credit for this goes to Jesica Howe -^.^-  ***

It all started on Wednesday. I guess. (Columbus Day weekend)

Spent the entire day getting shit organized, cuz of course we waited til the last moment to even think about shit. Played around at Walmart with Jd and Crissy, trying to keep them from buying shit they just didn't need. Helped load up the bus (her name is Molly Blue Bird), which was a lot of fun and involved lifting big wooden facade pieces onto the buss and tying it down.  I got to be the guy on top of the bus along with Gregor.  Finally we headed out about midnight. Btw, we officially had planned on leaving before 4pm.

One of the front windshields of the bus is broken, so is was quite windy and cold. My friend had given me my first taste of Meth right before we left out, just a tiny bit, and Momma Cat gave us all an Adderol so we would be up and talkative. We drank beer and talked and tried to stay warm, because as the night progressed, it just got colder and colder. We didn't want to stop for restroom breaks, to save on gas, so we would piss into a chopped up Gatorade bottle and then I would climb over the labyrinth of shit in the back of Molly to dump the piss out the back window. Momma Cat once dumped it out the nearest window... and figured out why I was climbing all the way back there to dump it.

Oh, the people on the bus with me were Gregor (driving), Cindy, Nugget, JD, Momma Cat , and ME!

We finally get there about 5 in the morning, and the first thing I notice were the stars. OMG fucking stars! And specifically that bright mother fucker that had been in the sky recently. We walk over to Sloan and Ian, who had come out the day before to start setting up Cold Camp (Cold btw, is City of Lost Dreams). We pass around some hooch, and then climb the effigy, which Caleb had built in a day(he's a god of get shit done). We hung out there for an hourish until the first rays of the sun start lighting up the world. I tried to sleep on top of the bus, but the Meth and Am phetamines were keeping me awake. That and Sloan was blasting Nirvana as loud as he could. At 6 a.m. So I meditated to Nirvana.

When if got light enough to see, I jumped off the bus, grabbed my Kukri http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gurkha_knife and headed off into the wood to explore. I kept my blade out because this part of Texas is known for having some nasty ass boars, and if I ran into one, it was going to die before I did. But other than that, I did my best to navigate the underbrush without hacking a path through. Lots of pokey things, slow going. I found some pretty cool spots, and the barbs wire borders of 3 sides of the property before I finally decided to stop exploring.

When I got back to camp, I noticed the Effigy (which was built to resemble the tree of life) had random vines and shit on it (courtesy of Tasha, Caleb's awesome wife). I thought this was awesome, so I gave myself the mission of covering it with as much random shit as possible. It was accomplished rather sporadically, because this was the day that I unleashed my ADHD.

I randomly helped Cold Camp build it's Cold West facade and gallows. No one knew how to make a proper noose (why would you make a gallows if you didn't have anyone who could make a noose?) so I made a 13 loop noose. Which I then put around my neck and wrapped the extra rope around me. Also, eye liner.  Have I mentioned I'm a goth at heart? But I digress. I met Helper, who is a giant ball of helpfulness. She's my hero. I helped as many camps as possible. Was given the mission of finding a pipe to smoke some weed out of 2 different times. Once I found someone with a pipe. Once I found an apple. They laughed in my face at the apple. Apples are awesome to smoke out of! Snobs. Lots of doing random shit, meeting random people, being random. The Effigy was sporadically decorated.

I loved getting there before most people did because I got to meet people as they came in. A lot of my closest Myschievia friends were made that day. Everyone was still in Default World mode on this day, shells were still up, fakeness abounded.

You know what the first thing they say to you when they meet you at the gate is?

Welcome Home.

Hung out at the greeter station. Rode Cindy's bike down the road and back so that I could be properly greeted. Just because I arrived early doesn't mean I don't deserve the proper Myschievia experience. Met two girls at Greeters. One offered to give me a motor boat. I ran away. The other was really hot too... flirted until she flirted a little bit to much back, and ran... Never remembered their names, even now.  Weird, cuz they are major recurring characters. Oh well. (wrote this a while ago.  They are now my burner momma's Judith and Shiny)

Chad took the Dome my sister Chrissy was planning on using for her stuff (she has to much damned stuff!!) up to greeters about 4pmish. They wanted to play a joke on her. I had bought the dome in '09 and had barely used it myself but it has been to a lot of burns in my place.  Anyways, me being me, I had to be the one to put it up. Crissy and Charlie were supposed to be there about 4... they got there about 7. Man, did she freak out when she saw the dome at the greeters station. Got really pissed at me. She thought I was being serious about setting the dome up there. I finally told her after about 30 seconds that is was a practical joke. She didn't understand that she still got to use the dome. She was pissed at me for like 30 minutes until our brother Jd told her what was what. Then she forgave me ^.^

We got the dome put up at her camp, Corporate Gypsy Faggots right as the sun was setting. By this time I had enough drugs and alcohol in my system to want to go party. So I took off my noose and my kukri and left them on the gallows at Cold. Bad idea. More on that later. And off I went to party!

What happened that night? Do you guys have any idea what burns are like at night? Lots of lights, lots of drugs and alcohol, and lots and lots of music. Turns out that the guys who DJ at the bar I go to every Wednesday were there, and every single night you could find them at the Effigy, tearing shit up with their beats. Nick is a demon, brutal with his mixing (in a good/bad way), Sparks is fucking awesome, brutal in the good way, Boston is trippy, makes it weird, and fucking Fropsy saved my life with his music (he would mix for hours and hours because everyone else would bale).

Lots of dancing. I hung out with Coty (first time I saw him with clothes on) while he was on his ranger shift. We talked about Adderol and ADD and random shit. I danced. I wandered. I hugs a lot of people. I drank stuff. I hung out with Jerome (which I heard as Tyrome and thus dubbed him that name) and Birdie laaate at night for their Ranger shift.  I met the "Other Lucky" an Irish bastard I immediately liked at the Gypsy Steampunk Circus bar.  We talked shit at each other and then wrestled for a while, until I was eventually defeated.  Probably a bad idea to wrestle in North Texas in the forest, but FUCK IT!  I finally fell asleep when the sky got lighter.

That was my Thursday Adventure.  (remembering all this and seeing how my connection with the people I met out there has grown is making my heart all puddly)

So it's been a week since I stood out on the street with my colorful sign and got me a job right?  Not the best job, but a job is a job.  I wish telling myself that worked.  That works for other people right?  Yea, not this guy. 

I missed work on Sunday and since I didn't have my phone on me, I wasn't able to call until 2 to tell them.  I was supposed to work that morning, though I'm not sure exactly when.  That information was never conveyed to me.  I figured Alan, the night boss, would call me and tell me the next morning.  I had no messages when I got home so I guess I was wrong on that one.  When I called to try to explain, I got Tanner's voicemail.  I left a message and then left a text. 

On Monday I tried to call again in the morning since I still hadn't heard from anyone.  Was starting to panic a little, but I did my best not to let it get to me with pretty good success.  The call again went to voicemail.  So I sent another text, asking them to call me and saying even if they didn't, I'd be waiting at the Walgreens at 5:30, which is where they last picked me up and about when they start work every day.  I called again when I got there.  Still nothing.  Scared.

Now it's Tuesday.  After and call and text I finally got a text back from Tanner saying that "No don't worry.  I'll call you later and explain."  I didn't hear from him by 5 so I walked over to Walgreens again.  After standing around for a bit, I sent another text "No call?"

Finally Tanner calls me.  Is not good.  I got this long triad about how I was supposed to stay in contact with the night manager, not the guy who hired me, irregardless of the fact that I didnt have the night managers number and when I had asked for it, he said it was pointless to give it to me because he had broken his phone. Tanner said something about only getting texts from me, even though I called every day. He said he would give me the night managers number, and I've gotten nothing in over an hour. Yea. 

Lost Boy fail.  Is sad now.

I hope I don't sound like I'm bragging, but I totally am. 

We left off on Sunday right?  Ok, so Saturday.

Lol! I just wrote 4 paragraphs about Sunday.  Oh well, copy paste to last post and forward ho!

Monday was cold and for the first part of it, due to my inability to defeat how lazy I am in the mornings, I was pretty bummed.  I did stuff at the library, but wasn't productive there.  Damn you lack of Coffee!  So when JD logged off, I headed home to do the poster thing.  I bought a big 2*3 ish poster for 50 cents and 8 markers for like 2 bucks.  I tried to write "Mission Accomplished" on it, but accomplished would fit so I settled on "HIRE ME" under which I wrote "for: Dog Walking, Paper Writing, Life Coach, Wingman, Domestic Chores, Escort, Finding Stuff, Odd Jobs"  Completing this lifted my spirits pretty effectively.  I also started video and picture documenting shit.  I will hopefully start posting vlog of my adventures to go along with my blog.  If I had my computer working this would be much easier.  I need to write that in War Chest.  *leaves*

*comes back hours later after being distracted* Where was I?  Oh yea, Monday.  I don't remember to much of Monday.  It was all overcast and rainy so I didn't get a lot done.  I think, can't really remember what, if anything, happened that night.  Oh, I just checked the date of my last blog entry.  That's what I did Monday night.  This shit takes HOURS!

Tuesday I got out of bed around 10ish.  I'm sure I woke up hours earlier and it took quite a while to defeat the morning lazies.  Part of the reason why it's so hard to get me out of bed is my dreams tend to be fucking awesome.  Crazy adventures and shit.  Anyways, I put on some nice and hopefully non-threatening clothes, and head over to the Family Dollar to get some noms to fuel me for a hopefully full day.  I see a bread truck parked outside, and I say to myself, "I wonder if they will give me any bread."  So I go inside, grab some sunflower seeds, and talk to the guy who is stocking the bread.  He gives me two loaves of Honey Wheat, and some hot dog buns!  Video Here

I brag about this to my roommates a little, make a sandwich, and then grab my sign and head out to the corner of University and Carroll.  I figured this would be a good place to get plenty of attention.  Videos in chronological order can be found here, here (I love my twin!), here, and here.  Go easy on me guys, these are the first videos I've ever taken of myself, ever.  I'm gonna try to edit them into something cool when I have the chance.  Anyways, it takes me like an hour to get my first (and only) job offer.  It was a position as a night janitor for a professional cleaning company.  In the next hour I meet a guy who tries to sell me a laptop.  I respect his hustle.  Reminded me of Honey Bear.  Another guy comes up and asks me if he can take a picture of my sign.  Says he respects that I'm not just asking for a handout and that he's gonna see what he can do.  That was cool.  I got ran off by a cop around 2:30, an hour before I estimated that I would have to leave to make it to my new job walking.  He was nice about it though.  So I go home, drop off my sign, drink some coffee, and then head out. 

I get about 20 feet from my house and as a truck drives by I am struck by the urge to stick out my thumb and give hitchhiking a try.  I stick out my thumb and the truck stops.  Act on your instincts!  He had spent time in the 70's hitchhiking, which is why he was willing to pick me up.  He takes me as far as the square, which shaved something like 1.5 miles off my trip.  Freakin win!  I thank him for the ride, tell him if he sees a party at Damn Dawg, he should drop by (since he lives close and seemed cool).  Elated from that experience, I continue walking to this new job with my thumb out.  I don't get very far when I get picked up again!  This guy was much closer to my name and worked as a ranch foreman west of Fort Worth.  That's pretty cool:)  I didn't know where the place was, but I knew the address, so he googled it.  He googled 100 off the right address though, so we kept missing it.  I told him when we stopped at the wrong address that I would call the guy and find it, that here was close enough.  He wanted for me to call and let him drive me to the place once we found out how to get there.  I wasn't comfortable with this, just because he had already put so much effort into getting me this close and I knew (you know, the knowing) that the place was crazy close.  So I shook his hand and we parted ways.  Southern Hospitality still exists.  I call the guy who had offered me the job, Tanner, and it turns out I was like 100 feet from the place.  And an hour early!  Was a very boring hour.

He eventually shows up around 4:30 and has me clean up the office to test my skills and to give me an hour of pay.  I talk to him about getting paid in cash because I had to pay rent by the very next day and I was about 80 short.  Was being the operative word.  About 5:30 the night janitor manager shows up.  His name is Alan, he's from Nicaragua and has been in the states since he was 10.  I think he's 28 now or something.  I also work with Ruth, who is younger than me and speaks barely any English, and Lady, who is 22 or something and is a American Mexican, meaning she speaks English like we go, a la bad lol.  Together the four of us clean a fabrication shop, a medical repair shop, the local plasma donation center, and a call center.  I had to resist the urge to take some of the candy the call center had in the storage room, as well as keep myself from writing shit like "you know you hate this job, your better than this, quit" on the desks of people who worked there.  Also, i found no evidence that the plasma center is run by or for vampires, but I still don't trust em.  We finish around 1, with the understanding that I wouldn't e able to work tomorrow, due to a family engagement.  PUBSTEP!

Let's see, what happened on Wednesday?  I scored some awesome shit in the dumpster of the Family Dollar across the street, including some orange and purple Halloween themed Christmas lights, a strobe light, some dog food, a foam sword, and lots of instant Velveeta shells and cheese.  WIN!  One could grow fat just off the waste of this rabidly consumerist world.  What else did I do?  I don't know, but I was in a great mood because, while I didn't have all my rent, I had the means to pay rent eventually.  Boy life gets better when you can fulfill the needs of the bottom of Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs. I got the top of that shit handled, but the bottom has always been an issue for me.  At the library I get an Mission from Andrea to find some cheap awesome Steampunk stuff for a outfit for her.  I also get a message from Curtis, asking how he can send me money!  I give him Cindy's email address because Chase will let you put money directly into someone's account if you know their email address.  That's pretty cool, good job Chase.  I'm sure I also did work on this website too.  And I remember Pandora was rocking my socks that day. 

I eventually went home to talk to my roommates about rent and shit.  Gregor also was having issues about paying on time, which I was happy about because it took a lot of the pressure off me.  Gregor confirmed that no one wanted me to move out and they wouldn't actually kick me out, but my past inability to pay had been a source of stress for everyone.  This is the real reason why I've been so depressed and stressed out this last while, because of the hardships I've been putting on my Family.  Es no bueno!  Anyways, I get Rachel to say she'll give me a ride to Pubstep, I get all sexy in preparation, and then hang out in the living room while I wait and write and shit.  Cindy comes home about 8:30 and hangs out in the living room with me, and her and Gregor work out the numbers for rent.  And Cindy tells me that Curtis sent me 200 dollars.  200!  Damn Dawg!  So I beat Gregor to paying rent on time since he comes up with the money about an hour later.  Around 10 o'clock I go find my phone because I had expected Rachel to come by by then and I see her message informing me that she couldn't do it sue to other circumstances and that she will see me there.  Luckily, about that time Gregor was getting ready to drop off the rent at the land lady's place, so I ask him if he'll drop me off at Pubstep and he agrees.  WIN!

And who should be there, but Regan!  Yay!  Regan is Rachel's sister and I have not gotten to hang out with her nearly enough.  She just turned 21 and I missed her celebration and shit.  Not very many burners came out that night, but the music was VERY good.  So, instead of socializing, I got to DANCE!  And Myra was there, one of the two girls in Denton I got a huge crush on.  I talked to her a few times, danced near her every chance I got, and even convinced her to stay longer.  It really was a good set.  I danced until the lights came on, and of course I was naked.  Glitter Girl showed up around midnight and became my dancing buddy for the rest of the night.  She game me a ride home, and I spent the next 2 and a half hours hanging out with Stranger, talking about his haunted house, movies, babies, etc.  I like that weird, intense mother fucker.  And I volunteered to be one of his clowns.  Probably the vampire clown.  How fucking scary. 

Thursday was boring.  I didn't know when or where I should be for work and Tanner didn't answer his phone the first few times I called him, so I left against about 4:30, thinking it might take an hour to get there.  I try the hitchhiking thing again, to great success!  I get picked up by a gamer nerd type who works at the Hamburger Time Machine on University.  He dropped me off at the front door of Alta Clean, where I wait for the next hour for Alan to get there and pick me up for work.  Hanging out with the crew was fun, but it's work, so nothing fun to tell you guys about.  It was a short night too, was over before 10.  I was really tired, from a combination of lack of sleep, and the vibe of the job.

Friday was the start of another epic adventure!  Marlon had a sleepover movie night!  First I had to work though.  Idk if I've told you guys this, but I volunteer to help this disabled couple who live across the street from me do stuff around the house.  the most important thing I do it lend them my manic energy.  But that day I cleaned their carpets.  How cool is that?  Took about two hours.  And then it was time for paying work.  I eventually got a hold of Tanner and he told me that Alan would pick me up at the Walgreens by my house at 6.  No big deal, except he told me when I was half way there walking @.@  Oh well.  I stuff some clothes for the sleep over in a bag Kotie had just given me  Work was no big deal, other than another night with barely any sleep making me tireds.  Lady dropped me off at Marlon's around midnight.

Oh, the beautiful people!  Kinda makes me want to cry just thinking about it.  I love those fuckers so much.  Who all was there?  There was Fropsie, Sean and Sheyanne, Katy and Coty, my burner mommies Shiny and Judith, Chim Chim, a girl from Pangea camp I never can remember with her boyfriend Red (normal looking? wait, idea, do burner girls date normalish guys to unconsciously lure them into our family?), Kelly, Stan, eventually Walys (omg, so crushing on her bad), and Marlon's ex-wife, Matt, and of course Marlon and Tyson.  We watched Zoolander(before I got there), Groundhog Day, Orgazmo, Mirror Mask, Wall-E, Up, Paul, Super Troopers, Your Highness; I Love You, Man; and I was watching Departed when I was taken to another thing.  More on that later.  When I got there, I looked at all the beautiful people, said high, other random words, and took a cold shower.  Marlon's gas was turned off.  Put mah naughty schoolgirl skirt and silk thai shirt on and joined my family for some awesomeness.  Didn't try to hard to watch Groundhog Day, though it was more awesome then I remembered.  There were to many distracting cuddles to get.  Orgasmo I had seen before but it took a while to remember it.  We didn't even watch half of it.  I didn't care one way or the other, I had cuddles.  Mirror Mask was intense and I want to watch it tripping.  Neil Gaimon wrote it so, you can imagine.  I specifically sat down with Shiny to watch it cuz she loved it and said I would to and it was important to her.  We shushed people.  Wall-E was great.  I think I went with Rob to Shelbies to wish her happy birthday during Wall-E.  Or maybe it was Up.  Whenever we did this, everyone else was choosing down, most of them down and out (translation, they were choosing to drop brainwaves and either be chill or sleep, which is down and out).  I got to actually talk to Marlon's ex, tell her that the divorce was actually good for him.  I think this cleared up some guilt stuff for her maybe?  Oh well, I had fun and shit.  We came back, and crashed out.  I woke up like 2 hours later, if that.  Tried to play some Skyrim (best fucking video game ever), but couldn't find it.  People eventually started waking up, and when about half of them did, I announced that it was time for up(translation, time to be active and doing stuff) so I put in Paul.  I think thats how it happened.  OMG the cuddles, they just didn't end.  Until half way through departed when Xssy picked me up and took me to Nita and Scott's house warming party. 

They are Wonderland Camp and I love this family.  It took us an hour and a half to get there and it only should have taken 30 minutes, but hey, thats always what happens when Xssy navigates.  (Xssy is gonna be pissed when she reads that, but hey, the truth only hurts as long as you deny it).  As soon as we get there Nita is standing outside, dressed semi-normal.  We huggle and she immediately tells of all the yummies (drugs) they got.  Not a super lot, but enough for everyone to have one.  I pick the shrooms cuz my best trips have all been on shrooms.  Shrooms I grow more, acid is just for play.  Perhaps I should have done the acid then?  lol.  They have a bad ass DJ station with some people with great tastes on the 1's and 2's, a projector screen with awesome visual, the WonderHookah was out, there were trip toys everywhere, two coolers of water and punch, snacks, not much alcohol, but Skye drunk me up and I was still drunk anyways, and lots of places to chill.  They do it right.  Did I mention that the Wonderland Family is fucking awesome?  Cuz they are.  They are the Rainbow kids.  I can't even tell you about all the cool things that happened while I was up.  But eventually I remembered that I was supposed to work at 11am-ish on Sunday.  Opps :)  I'm so bad at this.  So around 5 or so I put myself down.  Would find where everyone was at and just lay down.  I got plenty of cuddles, especially from Skye and Nita.  The rest will learn to be comfortable with touching me.  I know, I'm really sexy, but why does that have to get in the way of cuddles?!?  And they were completely cool with my down, sometimes doing down with me, but always letting my down be around their up. 

I wonder if I should put the rest of Sunday in there.  It's now Monday, and I missed work again (could get a hold of anyone)